I spent the last hour of yesterday watching the sun set. It was just me standing on Grand Anse beach, hearing the waves, the occasional bird call, spending the last of the day with the sky as it displayed its color.
As I watched, I wondered, “Where was all that fuss coming from yesterday? What did I really want to control?” As I stood on the beach marveling at the sunset, I relented, I am human and I crave control. I want to matter, I want to make a splash like the last wave that rolled in, I want to flash brilliant colour across the sky so that everyone can be amazed by my splendor. I want to show up everyday as magnificent. I want to be like the amazing Universe, and sadly at times when i struggle to control I am really competing with it.
As soon as I said it I knew the truth. I was not created to control, hence the reason that notion increases my anxiety. I was created to be as I am. I am graced with a purpose. There is no need to wonder if I matter, because I already do. I don’t have to flash color, I enhance whatever I touch. I don’t need to astonish anyone I was created amazing. There is nothing that I can do that will make me more than I am.
As I stood before the wonder of the sunset on the vastness of the beach I knew it all.
No need to be in control, I am all that I need, I have all that I need and the universe has provided everything just for me.
The trick is to remember.
What were you created to be?